ERIK H. ERIKSON:

Hope is both the earliest and the most indispensable virtue inherent in the state of being alive. If life is to be sustained hope must remain, even where confidence is wounded, trust impaired.

HELEN KELLER:

Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.

RALPH WALDO EMERSON:

Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year. No man has learned anything rightly, until he knows that every day is Doomsday.

"everyday is the best day ever"

GEORGE ELIOT:

What do we live for, if it is not to make life less difficult for each other?

EMILY DICKINSON:

If I can stop one heart from breaking,
I shall not live in vain.
If I can ease one life the aching,
Or cool one pain,
Or help one fainting robin
Unto his nest again,
I shall not live in vain.

who needs a drink?!

andrew and i finally talked about everything. We agreed on needing a break from living from each other and we are both going to try to be better about communicating. He told me that i was his best friend and he thinks we do have something special. I cried a lot. I understand his intentions a bit more. I underestimated him. he is absolutely wonderful and he does know what i want. somehow things got all messed up and we weren't talking about it.  

why can't i just let go completely? why do i need constant reassurance? 

I think andrew has changed me for the better - he's a very generous and loving guy and he usually sets a good example for me.  I'm going to be less bitchy just deal with my life.  I'm going to try to deserve him. and relax...

I have no right to say anything right now. I'm a fucking idiot and vain and untrustworthy. i'm a spoiled little brat to say the least. Everything he ever said about me was right. And still he didn't deserve to be treated this way. 

I'm done. I give up now. because i'm tired of disappointing everyone. He is great to me and i threw it all away just to feel wanted. 

joe was right.