andrew and i finally talked about everything. We agreed on needing a break from living from each other and we are both going to try to be better about communicating. He told me that i was his best friend and he thinks we do have something special. I cried a lot. I understand his intentions a bit more. I underestimated him. he is absolutely wonderful and he does know what i want. somehow things got all messed up and we weren't talking about it.  

why can't i just let go completely? why do i need constant reassurance? 

I think andrew has changed me for the better - he's a very generous and loving guy and he usually sets a good example for me.  I'm going to be less bitchy just deal with my life.  I'm going to try to deserve him. and relax...